Being Mom For A Day

Twice a year my mother-in-law makes her pilgrimage to Cleveland Clinic to have her bi-annual checkup. So, twice a year the roles are reversed and I get to be Mr. Mom for a day or so while Stephanie accompanies her. It’s fun to see the “other side” every now and then, just like I imagine she gets to see what I get to put up with when I’m on the road. Granted, I don’t usually have my mom with me wherever I go but still…having to stay in a hotel and eat horribly at some hole-in-the-wall dump restaurant (like a PF Chang’s or Olive Garden) and then having to use hotel shampoo and conditioner? It’s a life not made for someone with a light stomach.

Aaaaaanyway…

So tonight I had things to do. Actually…I had a schedule. It was hand-written on a blue sticky note and it had my itinerary for the night. It looked like this…

This was all fine and good but it’s what ISN’T on there that was the more challenging aspect of it.

First, let’s break this down. Stephanie pulled away from our home today at approximately 12:33pm. I remember this because I glanced at my watch while I was wheeling out the lawn mower to tackle the jungle formerly known as our yard. As I watched her mother’s tail lights disappear up our street, I put in my earphones, cranked up the music and chuckled to myself…”I got this.” And I did! For maybe a couple hours. Then I picked the kids up from school and it was showtime!

2:58pm – 8 minutes late getting into the pickup line at school because I forgot I had to run to the bank. I get a phone call on the Batphone…
Christopher: “Where are you?”
Me (trying to hide the fact that I’m late and at the back of the line): “I’m in the line. Don’t you see me?”
Christopher: “No. We’ll walk to the BACK of the school so we don’t have to wait here longer.” *click*

There ya have it. I’ve been in charge for a whole 8 minutes and I’m already a failure.

After picking the kids up, my (internal) itinerary says I have 2 hours for them to get their homework done, get them a snack, get them organized and off to the first stop of the night…Christopher’s baseball practice. 1 hour and 47 minutes later, Ava has her homework binder in her arms, paper falling out of it, an eraser-less pencil clutched in one hand, her new cell phone in the other. Christopher is rushing down the stairs, bag full of clothes his mother packed for him over his shoulder, his new birthday IPhone in one hand, basketball shoes in the other. I rush to get him a water bottle before we leave (it’s on the list!) and conveniently leave it on the table as we rush out the door to baseball practice. And so the night begins.

Upon arriving at baseball practice, I drop our children off at the park and, realizing we (I) forgot the water bottle, return home to get it. I also grab a water bottle for Ava and a soda for myself (calorie free Vanilla Coke. Perfect!) and proceed out the door with both dogs staring at me with that “Please take us!” look in their eyes. I pretend not to see them and keep on movin’!

Back at the baseball field, I watch the clock as time starts to grow short. I have 15 minutes to get Christopher from baseball practice to a basketball skills practice and it’s 6:13. In my head I crunch the numbers…6 mile drive, maybe 7 stop lights, gotta get them in the car…that’s at least 18 minutes…UNLESS I hit 5 of the lights! THEN it’s possible! As we head to the car, Ava asks for her phone. I have conveniently left it on the bleachers right where she gave it to me so she wouldn’t lose it when she went off to play with her friend. *sigh*

Ava runs and gets the phone, rushes up to jump car as we’re pulling away. Chris changes in the backseat while Ava and I search for something to listen to on XM radio. Ava wants Disney, I want 80′s On 8 and Christopher is busy answering texts in the backseat while trying to pull on his basketball shorts. I somehow managed to make it with 2 minutes to spare (hey…4 of those lights were on YELLOW mister!!!) and Christopher is shooting layups in the gym by 6:30. WIN!!!

Unfortunately, Ava had decided to roll in the grass at the park and is all kinds of itchy. And so, with a little under an hour before her gymnastics class, I rush her home to get her a quick shower and a snack. When we arrive, Barkley and Stella are staring at me. It’s 6:45. Their dinnertime. Ava showers, I feed the dogs, update my Facebook status and somehow end up descrambling Ava’s english words for HER homework (I dunno how this happened) and then we’re off and running her to her class.

7:22pm – I drop Ava off at the studio for her 7:30pm class and I watch her walk into the building. I have to pick up Christopher in 10 minutes. I don’t like leaving Ava but she assures me that it’s okay and I’m not doing anything wrong. So I head south to get Fer.

7:35pm – Arrive back at the gym as things are wrapping up and my phone rings. Ava’s instructor hasn’t arrived and Ava is all alone. Luckily, her assistant principal (a friend of our family) is there and calls me. So now I feel REALLY bad as I’m rushing Christopher out of the gym to hurry back to get Ava! As I’m pulling out of the parking lot, I get a text that the instructor has arrived and no need to hurry. I sigh and slow down after peeling out of a school parking lot. All is good.

After Ava’s class is over, I take both of the kids to Skyline for dinner, get them home, get Fer showered and everyone is in bed by 9:35pm. Except I’ve left the windows open upstairs all day and it’s about 85 degrees so…after a little bit of complaining…I allow both kids to head downstairs to sleep in the much cooler basement.

It’s now 10:55 as I wrap this up. Being Mom for a day has its headaches but ya know what? I kind of enjoy it when I get a chance to do it. It shows me how much Stephanie does for this family and I should never take that for granted. And now…I’m off to bed. Gotta get the kids up and moving tomorrow for school!

Today is Stephanie’s birthday. Sadly, today, December 30, 2012, will also be remembered as the day that her father, Bobby Edmunds, passed from this world. Bobby had a difficult few years after suffering from a series of strokes. On the day following Christmas, he suffered a heart attack and was transferred from rehabilitation to a hospice. Then today in the late afternoon, he passed.

Bobby was always quick to tease and his love for his daughters and his grandkids was always evident. On Christmas Day, Stephanie, the kids and I all got the chance to visit him. He was in a great mood and very happy. I think seeing him that day was a blessing. His grandkids will now always have that memory of him sitting in his chair, opening his gifts, smiling and enjoying our company.

Something I will always remember about Grandpa Bobby was his precocious response when asked how he was feeling. Instead of a typical “Good” or “I’ve had a bad day,” his response was always, “Oh…fair to middlin’.” It was his catchphrase and one that will always remind me of him. Rest in peace, Grandpa. We love you and we miss you dearly…

2012 Was A Very Good Year

First off, I would like to acknowledge the fact that I am a Doritos junkie. Seriously…as I sit here and type, I can barely manage a thought without eating a chip. What IS it with these things anyway? I’m a 44 year old man with a serious love for Doritos. Is it weird? I dunno. I DO know I’ve been eating these damn things since I was a kid and they NEVER get old!!! They keep adding cheese and flavors and I have to eat them ALL!!!

Ok…with THAT out of the way…let’s get down to the brass tax of this post.

2012.

What can I say about 2012? What do I NOT say about this amazing year? So much to say, so little time. So you want “highlights?” There are too many. So…let’s get started…

Ava has had a remarkable year which started out with her playing violin. She then decided to opt out of that for a bit to concentrate on swimming, volleyball, basketball and her artwork. After taking a week-long horse-riding camp in early summer, she has been bitten by the horse bug and now she is taking horse-riding lessons. She also enjoys hanging out with her many friends and playing on our neighbor’s trampoline. To say she has an amazing sense of humor would be doing my daughter a disservice. Her laughter is contagious and I can only hope she manages to keep it as she prepares for next year and the dreaded 4th grade.

Christopher turned the BIG 1-0 this year and double digits has been good for him. Although he’s been incredibly busy with a full baseball schedule in the summer, another season of Spartan football (in which he was the starting QB and got them to the Junior Youth Super Bowl) in the fall and now with 3 basketball teams, he has managed to keep his grades up and is still as animated as ever. He’s growing quickly though (and so are his friends) and so there have been some interesting conversations we’ve had but that’s all to be expected. Life goes by too quickly for Christopher (who is now called Chris at times or “Fer” when playing sports) but he does enjoy the occasional hang with his mom or me, and those times are awesome!

Stephanie continues to work at Sephora as well as being “Team Mom” for Christopher’s baseball & football team. She also has been involved in many school-based activities and manages to have a strong interest in our small community here. A lot of people in our area know Stephanie and she has become involved in many activities on many different levels. I am proud of all the hats she wears and I am glad that she has seemed to find a great niche for herself.

As a family, we had some great times this year! We went to Gatlinberg, TN for a tournament with Christopher’s baseball team and we all went zip-lining for the first time! We also took a trip to Destin, FL with many of our friends and their families. I wasn’t able to stay the entire trip but I DID manage to get a nasty sunburn on the top of my feet! OUCH! And we watched the Kentucky Wildcats win the NCAA Final Four with a decisive victory over Kansas! The highlight of the tournament though was watching Ohio University get to the Sweet 16 before getting beat in OT by North Carolina. Still…a pretty great run for my Bobcats! We also went to Patrick & Katie’s wedding in Williamsburg, VA. What a beautiful wedding and the reception was a blast! It’s always good to see family and on Thanksgiving we went home for turkey dinner and lots of dessert!

In MY life, I’ve never been so busy! And the events were bigger this year than they’ve ever been! I can only believe that this year will go down as my most successful of my career. Here is a list of the events I was a part of this year…

1. The AFC Championship game (Baltimore @ New England)
2. The Super Bowl in Indianapolis
3. The Senior Bowl
4. NCAA Basketball Tournament (Louisville & Boston sites)
5. The NFL Combine
6. The NFL Draft
7. The Masters
8. FOX Reds Baseball
9. AT&T National
10. The John Deere Classic
11. The Olympics (Wrestling)
12. Navy vs Notre Dame in Dublin, Ireland
13. NFL On CBS and Thursday Night Football for NFL Net

It was an honor to be involved with any and ALL of these events. Of them all, the Olympics will forever be a highlight of my career. I was lucky to be on a great crew that was televising the Wrestling events and I will always remember that particular trip. I also managed to squeeze a visit to Stonehenge out of that trip which was a thrill for me. I’ve always WANTED to see those druid stones! The AFC Championship is the most viewed event I’ve ever worked here in the U.S. and with a HUGE audience watching, Ravens kicker Billy Cundiff pulled a chip shot field goal attempt wide that would have tied the game but instead gave the Patriots a shot at Super Bowl XLVI. I also received my 2nd national Emmy for working with the FOX National crew on baseball this past year. So THAT happened…

On a more personal level, this year has been just as successful at home. We gained a new family member with the addition of our new kitten that was originally named “Reece Cup” but was soon changed to…well…”Kitten.” I hit the big 4-4 in December and got a new wallet out of it. We had our bathroom renovated after a water disaster that left me a little waterlogged in August. We also  stabilized our house by having steel pierings installed that will hold the foundation in place so there will be less shifting in our little house on the hill. I went on a mini-vacation with my best friends to New York City in May. I had my 25th Class Reunion in August and had a BLAST with all my former classmates! I’ve also somehow managed to have more family time even though I’ve been on the move quite a bit. My mentality on my job has changed this year. This year I’m accepting it for what it is. In the television industry, doors open and they close. With family, that door is ALWAYS open. Here’s hoping the upcoming year will find more doorways open and the continual growth and happiness of my family.

I wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

GO 2013!!!

HEY!! What about ME?!?! I was BORN this year! Don’t forget about me!!!

Oh yeah…and we welcomed Ava & Christopher’s new cousin Drake into our family this year. Congrats to my sister and her husband, Chris, who seemingly know how to have cute kids!

Just ’cause…I love this shot!

Oh yeah…and I beat my brother at basketball on his OWN court! (And you thought I’d forget…didn’t ya Frank? LOL!!!)

A Wedding To Remember

After dating for a number of years, Patrick & Katie finally decided to knot it up. And on a spectacular weekend in November, we got to share in their nuptials and enjoy the company of family in the beautiful state of Virginia.  If there’s ever been a cuter couple, I don’t know one and their wedding day was simply perfect. The kids, Stephanie & I all enjoyed our visit and want to wish the love birds a great life together! Here are a few photos of our weekend. Congrats!

The blushing bride & Ava

Isn’t she lovely?

Don’t we look strapping?

The First Dance

Seriously? The cutest couple ever…right?

The usher. You’ll sit where he TELLS you to sit lady!

Uncle Wayne and his other halves

HEY!

Happily married!

Taking Advantage Of Not Taking Things For Granted

As I’ve been learning, there are things in my life that I take for granted every day. I take for granted that my wife will take care of my kids when I’m at work. I take for granted that whenever I go to visit my Mom & Dad there will be pork chops and mashed potatoes for dinner. I take for granted that my friends will always be there whenever I want to pop in for a visit. What I’m learning is that I shouldn’t take these things for granted…ever. Because you never know when things will change.

Last week I received some bad news…one of my closest friends is leaving Cincinnati for a new job. It’s a great job, I’m sure, but it is gonna suck not having he and his family around. I guess I always thought our kids would grow up together, play together and they’d always be around. Now that they’re going to be leaving, I feel as if I didn’t spend enough time with them. I should have been around more this past summer, hung out in their yard, had a few more beers and a lot more laughs. But sometimes busy schedules and a lack of time gets in the way of friendships and that’s just how it goes. Now that I know that they’re going to be gone, I wish I hadn’t taken my time with my friend and his family for granted. Either way, I wish them well (and I am not saying who it is because they are still making the announcement at this time) and I look forward to visiting their new home during my travels but it won’t be the same. I’ll miss their friendship and their kids. It’s always sad times when people move but this family has been a part of my life for so long that I can’t fathom them NOT being there. Hopefully we will get the chance to visit them once they get settled in their new home. Is it bad that I also hope they hate it where they are going and want to come back immediately? Yeah…probably… lol

This past weekend my parents came down to visit us in Cincinnati. In their time here, they got to see Ava’s volleyball team win their first playoff match, Christopher’s football team win their first round playoff game (with Christopher making a great INT and scoring the game winning TD) and one of Christopher’s basketball games (which didn’t turn out as well as the football game). It was so much fun having them here and it was exciting for the kids to have them see them in action. I know for a fact that I take my parents for granted. I am so fortunate to have such a great family and so I this weekend I tried to just enjoy our time with them. I shudder to imagine my life without my parents or my siblings. I love them so much and despite the fact that I don’t get to see them often, I always consider them to be with me wherever I go. There will always be a part of me connected to ALL of my family members. We are such a tight-knit family that it’s impossible to NOT feel that connection. Do I miss seeing them more? Absolutely. And so I try to take advantage of the time I get to spend with them, even if it is only a quick stop while driving through town.

On a completely different level, I also found out last week that I won’t be working an event that I have been fortunate to work for the last 7 years. My first Super Bowl was in Detroit in 2006. Since then I have been lucky to be invited back for 6 more. It’s a HUGE event and I have enjoyed being a part of the broadcast team that works to make it that way. This year I didn’t make the cut to go to New Orleans and now I’m feeling nostalgic about it. Despite the fact that it’s “just a job,” I guess as someone who gets to travel and work some really cool events for a job, I take for granted the fact that those gigs will be there from year-to-year. That is obviously not the case. So this year, I’m not going to be at one of the more prestigious events in the country. That being said, what I WILL do is appreciate the fact that I’ll be able to maybe attend a Super Bowl party with my friends and hope that maybe someday the opportunity might come around again some day.

So a new day is dawning. Friends come & go, family time is compromised, work events change from day-to-day. Life is like that. It’s an ebb & flow and I have to learn to row with the tide and not swim against the current so much. So in that regard, here I am learning that life isn’t something I should take for granted. I need to learn to appreciate what I have and take advantage of the moments I get because you never know when things will change and then *poof*…what you thought you would always have is gone. Take advantage of the best of times and love the ones who are so important in my life.

To quote from one of my favorite movies, “I am at home with the me. I am rooted in the me that is on this adventure.” So…this is me on this adventure and I am going to do my best to not take that for granted.

 

Watching Them G(r)o(w)

5:25pm – Stephanie is rushing them out the door. Football and cheerleading practice begins at 6 and they can’t be late!

5:27pm – Kids don’t even realize I won’t be home tonight. They have forgotten that I’m traveling. It’s understandable…I do that a lot these days.

5:28pm to 5:32pm- The kisses & hugs begin. Christopher gives me not 1, not 2, but 3 big hugs in the span of 3 minutes. Ava sits down next to me and asks me where I’m going. I tell her and give her a big hug. She is smiling at me and she wants to know when SHE gets to ride on a plane again. “It’s been at LEAST 3 years!”, she says.

5:33pm – Kids at the door, I hug Stephanie as she turns to leave. We’ve had a good day today. A nice lunch together, got some chores accomplished. A quick kiss, a little longer hug and then she’s off. Christopher gives me one more hug (he’s ALWAYS been affectionate!) and they all turn and walk down the steps to our front porch. They walk down the hill that is our front yard and they are smiling and waving goodbye. As the go to get in the car, they blow me kisses.

5:35pm – Stephanie pulls down the street. I see the kids waving from the back seat and each one is smiling. “See you soon, Dad!” they both call out. I see Steph giving me the “parade wave.” The car pulls away and I watch as it cruises up our street. The sun is shining, there is a cool breeze and just like that…they are gone.

Many times I have wondered if I have done the right things. This job of mine, it’s a great gig. I love it and I have many tell me how lucky I am. Funny thing is…I DO feel lucky. But not because of my job. I’m lucky because my family understands that what I do is important to me and it keeps us in our home. I am very fortunate to have a good job, that I get to go to some cool places and that I work with so many professional television production and technical teams. But what it boils down to is that my family loves me. Nothing else really matters and as I watch my kids growing, I know they understand me. They may not like my job all the time, but they understand it’s a part of who I am and that I am doing the best I can to support them so they can enjoy their time as kids.

In the past few years, I have spent a lot of my time wondering and worrying. I’m constantly aware of how much I am missing and it’s hard. A part of me wants to stay home, to be here with them 100% of the time. But lets face it…that’s not possible. Even if I was home 100% of the time, I’d still have to work somewhere and who is to say that it would be a job that would allow me to be at all of my son’s games or my daughter’s performances. Nothing is guaranteed in life and so…I am working on the belief that I do what is best for me and my family. I love this job of mine but it doesn’t define me. My wife & kids, my family, my friends, my home is who I am. And I hope that the time I spend with them when I am home is what they will remember in the end. Not the being gone part. The being gone part is a necessary evil.

My kids are getting bigger every day and I have come to terms with the fact that I haven’t been with them every single second of their lives. But the time I do spend with them, I try to make special. It’s those moments that I think they will remember and it’s in their smiles as they walk down our front lawn that I realize that despite all of my worries, they understand and they appreciate. And, in the end, that’s the best I can do.

Stephanie Turns The Big…uh…35…no…29…? Eh…It Was Her Birthday.

Please Disregard the Cup…

So this year was THE year. The year that Stephanie had a BIG birthday. It might not have been as big as her 16th or 18th or 21st or 30th or…well…I’ll stop there. Needless to say, we had to celebrate in style so we booked a corner at our favorite local spot and invited 40 or more of our closest friends (although I admit…I kinda screwed up the invites and a couple of people didn’t get theirs. Sorry Rachelle and Kim and whoever I might be forgetting….again.) to celebrate Stephanie’s…REALLY big birthday! Here are some moments…

My accomplice

Hot, Hot, Hot!

Jennie Loves EVERYBODY…

Time Keeps On Slipping (x2) Into The Future

We all know the song…right? Steve Miller Band. “Fly Like An Eagle.” 1976. Well crap….here ya go then…

It’s not Bob Dylan but the lyrics go like this…

Time keeps on slippin’, slippin’, slippin’ 
Into the future 
Time keeps on slippin’, slippin’, slippin’ 
Into the future…

And ain’t that the truth?  I remember when Stephanie & I had our first baby. Christopher hadn’t even been born yet and I had people telling me…”ENJOY THOSE EARLY YEARS, SONNY. THEY GO BY FAST!” And so I listened and I tried to enjoy them the best I could. I will always look back on these first few years and try to remember so many little things but I imagine there is already plenty that I’ve forgotten.

Yesterday I was going through some old photos that I had originally taken with my old camcorder. They were taken over a series of events starting with our marriage and honeymoon. I know I had a film camera with me (BEFORE digital pictures?!? How did we ever survive???) but I managed to take a few shots with the video camera. Here are some of the honeymoon highlights…

After that, there were a few random family photos (Kathy…you had short hair!) and then a picture from New York City when Steph & I went a month after 9/11 and the city was still in shock. I remember walking down to the site and the entire area was still desolate and eerily quiet.

Following that picture there are a couple of photos of Steph pregnant with Christopher (which I won’t post for fear of my life…even though I think baby belly’s are kinda sexy…) followed by his arrival in 2002. This was taken in the hospital immediately following his bursting onto the scene on April 29, 2002…

From there the pictures follow his growth. I don’t know when I took each of these because the camera doesn’t date them however they appear to be in sequence…

After this photo, Ava made her appearance on the scene. She came to us in August of 2004. What a cute little baby and I’ll never forget how full the hospital was at the time of her birth. Apparently it was a full moon that night and you know what they say about hospitals during a full moon…

Random photos and they span a time frame of over 5 years or so. On this particular geek stick there are 34 pictures from “those days” and there doesn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to them. They’re just random shots that I must have taken whenever I was rolling on my video camera. So funny to look at them now and see my children back then. It doesn’t seem like that long ago that Christopher was sleeping on my belly on the chair on the back porch or Ava was scooting herself across the kitchen floor on her butt (she never DID learn to crawl!).

“Enjoy these days while you can!” they always said…and I have tried. But today I’m hanging up clothes in my son’s room and they require an adult sized clothes hanger and my daughter is learning how to count and use money and I realize that the baby days are far behind me. Funny how life goes in cycles. One minute they are babbling incoherently and splashing in the water and the next, they’re having an educated conversation with you about metamorphosis and taking 20 minute showers. Where does the time go?

I have many friends who had their children at an early age and are now close to being empty nesters. I can’t imagine that. I realize I have plenty of time left however I have to imagine that if the time I have coming up goes by as quickly as the time that has just passed, I really DON’T have much time left with them at all. These pictures are a testament to that. Not that I want to get ahead of myself but there are only so many days/weeks/months left and then my children, the ones I saw come screaming into this world, will be out on their own and they will be dealing with all of the things that I am dealing with now. The cycle of life continues and they will be exactly like me. They’ll go out into the world on their own and start from scratch. They’ll hopefully be successful however I realize they will make plenty of mistakes. I know I have and I’ve learned from them.

This was the last still photo taken on my video camera. I’m thinking 3 years old…during soccer season.

But let’s not get too far ahead of ourselves yet…okay? I’ve got plenty of time to watch them grow and to make more memories. I just don’t want the ones associated with these pictures to be forgotten. It doesn’t matter how big or how old they get, they’ll always be my babies. I can’t wait to see what the next 12 years or so have in store for me. Today, as I was hanging my son’s clothes, I glanced around his room and stopped for a moment just to soak it in. It’s a cluttered mess, of course…but one day it won’t be. One day he will pack all of these things into a box and be gone and then he’ll only be able to make visits once every 3 months or so (if I’m lucky…right Mom?).  A quick glance in my daughter’s room offered the same thoughts and so…I have made a pact with myself…I can’t be with them for EVERY moment but the moments that I AM there for are gonna be special.

At times in my life I’ve taken crap for taking so many pictures. I use my camera all the time, taking a shot here & there, watching for moments that I can capture. Some may consider it an annoyance. Some might find it aggravating. But when I see these pictures they remind me of moments that maybe I might not have remembered without them. So I won’t apologize for taking pictures anymore. What I’m taking aren’t just pictures….they’re my memories. And I never know when I might want to relive one. Like right now…

11th Anniversary Weekend

Guess who the big winner was THIS year?

October 14th, 2011 was the 11th anniversary of Stephanie & I. Seeing as how I broke the bank last year for our 10th, we both took the low road for this one and decided to spend less money on each other and just take the weekend to enjoy ourselves and that’s what we did. On Friday the kids were off from school so we went shopping for Halloween costumes and Ava went to Justice to get some school clothes! It was a relaxing day with nothing really happening except for Stephanie’s cold making her miserable. And then in the evening we hung out with Stephanie’s bestest friend Jennie and sat around the fire pit trying to keep warm. Believe it or not…it was probably colder in Jennie’s house (their family likes the house to be a balmy 27 degrees).

On Saturday, Steph & I hopped on a bus with 36 of our best friends (mostly friends and parents of kids who go to Christopher & Ava’s school) and headed down to Keeneland in Lexington for some horse racing. The weather was perfect and we ended up winning about $200 (only brought home $75 which went directly towards paying the sitter!). We had a great time with all our friends and didn’t get home until 9pm! Funny story was that I ended up winning with 2 tickets that the window takers got wrong…but I’ll take the money and run! Hey…it’s not MY fault they can’t hear through those glass windows!

I THINK I won this race also…

On Sunday I was able to watch Ava cheer for the Spartan Starter team and Christopher play against the Bengal Tigers in the morning. Both did great with the cheerleaders performing their dance routine that they did for a competition and Christopher scored on an extra-point and had a lot of scoring opportunities! Later that evening we went to visit my friend, Newman, and had dinner with he and his family.

All in all, a great way to celebrate our 11th year of marriage! Now…what are the betting odds for year 12?

Facebook Wants To Know…

“What’s on your mind?”

Daily I log onto Facebook, the bastion of friendly personality conflicts, dramas and poignant prognostications, and I see this little question and I am forced to ask myself…

“Self…what IS on my mind?”

And I think about it. And I wonder about it. And I roll it around in my head for a few minutes. Sometimes I come up with a thought. Sometimes I have a funny thing to say. Sometimes I find some minutia that is neither important or funny but just seems to fit my moment. But more often than naught, I find myself kind of stumped.

There are several reasons for this, I suppose. I guess truthfully…I’m really not that thoughtful. I read so many status updates that my friends post that are really insightful. Some are religious. Some are poignant. Some are thought-provoking. And generally the best thing I can come up with is the fact that I like to watch “The Andy Griffith Show” (which, don’t get me wrong, is a great show but still…)? It’s ridiculous.

“What’s on your mind?”

Ya know what Facebook? That’s a damn good question. And I’m sorry to say that you have found me in a very sorry state. My life is complicated. I’ve been unfocused. I’ve been neglectful and hurtful and I’ve made some bad decisions. It’s not that I’m a bad person, I don’t think. Actually…I think I’m a good person who has just been juggling too many balls for maybe a little too long. I’ve taken the easy route and turned my back on certain people who are important to me. So now I have to make that all right again. And a simple Facebook status update isn’t gonna cut it for me anymore.

“What’s on your mind?”

I got a LOT on my mind lately actually. As do most of the 697 people who call me friend, family or foe. Every day I log on and I see someone else who has a situation. Someone else who has a friend who needs a prayer. Someone else who hates their job. I think I’m starting to get it, Facebook. I’m coming to a conclusion and maybe I’m a little late to the game but I think I got it…

Life is not as perfect as I would like it to be.

So you wanna know what’s on my mind? Well…I’m tired of being complacent about my situation. I’m tired of the way I feel angry and tired and bitter and embattled in drama. I read and I watch and I see everyones hurt and dissatisfaction. It’s enough that I feel that way too but then to add to that is the fact that I can’t help anyone else when I can’t even help myself. Then I’m just a bystander, someone who would love to help each and every one of them, but I can’t because I got my own issues to deal with. And they can’t be solved by a funny anecdote or a single line of irresponsible texting. This shit is hard and personally I haven’t been dealing well.

But now I have a plan. I have my eyes open and I’m trying to push ahead. I don’t want to make it harder on myself anymore. I don’t want it to hurt anymore. And I don’t want anyone else to find anger or hatred in anything I might have said or done. I have ignored the basic rule which is…”Do unto others as you would have other do unto you.” I haven’t followed that rule and now I get it and I’ll take whatever comes my way.

So…you wanted to know what was on my mind, Facebook? Well…there ya go. My life ain’t all fun and roses. As a matter of fact, my life was spiraling out of control, I just didn’t see it. But now I see what needs to happen and I’m aiming to fix it. We all make mistakes and we all suffer the consequences. Sometimes those mistakes aren’t that important, sometimes they cost us a few bucks, sometimes they are life altering. I’m not sure where my mistakes have left me but I imagine at some point I’ll wake up and I’ll know.It will all be clear…someday.

What will my life be like then? I have no idea. It’s out of my control. But what I CAN do is see what my mistakes are and learn from them. And then I can honestly give you an update that I can be proud of. I can say one way or the other whether or not I’m feeling good or bad, happy or sad, angry or at peace. Right now…I’m kind of in limbo. But I’m working on it and I’m feeling pretty damn good about it. So…when I see that question flashing at me on my computer screen…

“What’s on your mind?”

Well…I guess you’ll know when I know. Or maybe not. As for right this second…I really love “The Andy Griffith Show” if for one simple reason…it reminds me of a time when things weren’t so difficult and every problem could be fixed in 20 minutes or less. It’s not like that anymore, I understand, but damn those days are appealing. So don’t worry about me Facebook. I’m all good. Or, at least, I’m trying to be. And it’s never gonna be perfect but at least my eyes are open a little bit more now and I can say I’m working on my imperfections and I’m very much a work in progress. So what’s on my mind, Facebook friends? Well…

So there ya go.

10th Anniversary Trip: S.F. & Napa Valley

For our 10th anniversary, my wife & I made a trek across the U.S. to visit San Francisco and the Napa wine country. Seemed like the thing to do considering Stephanie had never been to San Fran and neither of us had been to Napa and we both kinda like wine. Not a lot of wine, mind you…but a little. So what the hell…right? 10 years in and we deserve a drink! LOL

Anyway…we had a wonderful time and the weather was great. We were only there for a couple of days but that was enough to sample some wonderful wines. We visited 4 wineries and sipped mucho vino and even bought a vat, a bottle, a couple bottles, OKAY OKAY!!! We bought 6 bottles and they are being shipped right now to our house! Geez! We also visited Steph’s cousin and his wife. We ate sushi and drove VERY CAREFULLY around the San Francisco cityscape. Not the easiest city to drive in, that San Francisco. Lots of hills, if ya didn’t know. Anyway…here are the pictures. Let’s start out with some HIPSTAMATIC!!!

Now more normal photos…

Steph’s cousin Chris & the view from his apartment!

Wine Country

V. Sattui Winery

Castello di Amorosa Castle Winery

My favorite shot of the bunch!

10 Years Later…

14 years ago I met the woman of my dreams. She was a television news producer, I was a television director. And thus…a match made in heaven. From there we moved to Phoenix, hated the heat, moved back to Cincinnati and proceeded to co-habitate in a great 2-level apartment overlooking the city skyline. 2 years after that we were engaged.

10 years ago, on October 14th, 2000, my wife and I were married on a warm autumn evening in Lakewood, KY. It was a relatively small ceremony consisting of mostly work friends and our families and, like most weddings, it seemed like it was over in the blink of an eye. I cried during the ceremony. I think the reason I cried was because it hit me that the woman who was standing by my side was someone I was willing to love forever, die for and never take for granted. This was the woman I had always wanted. She was beautiful, resilient, self-motivated and caring to a fault. She was all I could ever want and, in my mind, she was out of my league. What she ever saw in me is beyond me, but there we were…exchanging vows…and my life would never be the same.

Little did I know what the future had in store for us. As we proceed from one stage to the next in such rapid succession, our lives are in a constant state of evolving. Our relationship has changed so much in 10 years with the addition of 2 children, a home and multiple jobs. When we were married, Stephanie was the primary bread winner in our home, I was just getting started with the 2nd stage of my career. Today she is a stay-at-home mother with more responsibilities than I could ever bear. She is the constant in our children’s lives as I work hard to keep up with our ever changing times. Of course, at the heart of most matters is money and the lack of it. Often times I am working to support our family monetarily as she supports it emotionally. This, in many instances, is a sticking point but we have both made our share of adjustments as we face these realities head on. 10 years of trying to get ahead and working to give our children the best we can offer has its moments of hardships, but I would hardly call us “divided.” On the contrary, despite the differences that we might have, in most cases we have found that we are both fighting for a common cause, just in different ways.

10 years ago, my wife became my partner and we set out on this journey. One could say it has had its ups & downs. One could say that it has been interesting to watch us change with the times. And one could say that, at times, we have been swimming upstream. But the one thing that no one could ever say about my wife and I is that our lives are boring or contrived. If anything, we strive on adversity. We fight for what we believe in and we have laid a strong foundation with our children that I hope they will carry with them through the rest of their lives.

My wife and I have shared some wonderful times and I am hoping that she would share them with me all over again if given the opportunity. It has been an amazing 10 years. And this week we will be celebrating by taking a few days off for ourselves. Off to Napa and a few bottles of wine and then to Los Angeles for the wedding of a dear friend. Here’s hoping for a relaxing and uneventful trip…because for us…that would be something TOTALLY different!

The entire crew

The Super-Secret Gift Card Drawer

I don’t know about you, but at our house, little piles of stuff seem to accumulate daily. Where there was once counter space, there are piles of papers. Where there was once cabinet space, there are pots and pans stacked up. Where there was once an empty corner, there’s baseball equipment. And as the kids get older, it continues to get worse & worse. So today I decided to open up a few drawers to see what we could get rid of. A good purging was in order and so…I figured might as well start with the kitchen hutch.

If you have a kitchen hutch, you know the real purpose of this style of furniture…it’s a place to hide your crap. Oh sure…you COULD put your nicest tupperware on it or maybe put a vase to accentuate your kitchen, but for the most part, it has drawers and doors and so, by all legal rights, it’s a place to hide crap. And so we do. We have the kids’ artwork and empty bowls and serving trays and just about everything else in there. And apparently this was also the storage place for my wife to keep her gift cards that she has been receiving for birthdays, anniversaries, party gifts and whatever else throughout the years.

If you’re like me, if you give me a gift card, I’m going out and spending it. I know myself and my thought is this…you just got free money, might as well spend it! Right? I’m not gonna save a gift card for a rainy day! Screw that! I’m spending that bad boy as soon as I can get my shoes on and get to the store! So imagine my surprise when I opened the top drawer of our kitchen hutch and discovered a gold mine of gift cards!

I’m not gonna lie…I knew it was there. But I had NO IDEA how much my wife had been hoarding for the past 2 or 3 years! Seriously…gift cards dating back to 2008?!?! Seriously???

We have Nordstrom gift cards and Kohl’s gift cards and a sporting goods store gift cards and Kids R Us gift cards and Victoria’s Secret gift cards and Pinera Bread gift cards and Applebee’s gift cards and Starbuck’s gift cards (that one is in my wallet) and free passes to a skating rink and facial gift cards and massages and…did I mention a Victoria’s Secret gift card? Oh yeah…I did. And a couple of cards to more food places and another children’s toy store and on and on! I mean…there’s got to be at least $600 worth of gift cards in this drawer!?! And the biggest kicker of all? A gift card to Target for $50. Seriously? A gift cad to Target? My wife is there 8 times a week! How could we possibly have a gift card to Target in our house?

Needless to say, the gift cards are now gonna be put to good use. They have been pulled out of the drawer and will be put in wallets and spent as soon as I can possibly drag her to Target and Nordtroms and Kohl’s and Victoria Secret and all the OTHER places where we need to be putting these things to good use. Because a gift card is a terrible thing to waste. And we certainly wouldn’t want to hurt Victoria’s feelings…

Where I Belong Is Where I Am At…I Think?

My family lives in a little cape cod near Cincinnati. We love it here…especially my wife, who has many friends and she loves our little neighborhood. I also enjoy it here but it’s going on 9 years and I have to be honest…I don’t know anybody. Well…that’s not necessarily true. I’ve made friends, of course. Our neighbors are all awesome. My wife has made friends with several families who have now become our friends and our kids all play together and they are great. But the reason I say I don’t know anybody is because I have only lived here 9 years. And I don’t go out. And I don’t really meet people. And when I do, I’m really not all that chatty. And most people who live here in our little town have lived here their entire lives.

The other night, my wife & I went out on a couples night. We went out with 2 other couples. One couple we’ve known for years. The other have quickly become 2 of our best friends. So we all went to a local restaurant and we aren’t in there for 30 seconds when people start to recognize our friends. First a brother came up, then an old high school friend, then a former co-worker, then another high school friend. And so it went…all night long.

Wanna know how many people knew me?

Zero.

And I’ve lived here 9 years.

Does this bother me? Not really. I don’t socialize the way my wife does. She knows people on the schoolboard. She knows parents & teachers and a few local politicians. I know the people on my street. Well…I know a FEW of the people on my street and a couple who live one street away. Other than that, I’m a little limited on my neighborly knowledge. So when I’m sitting in a restaurant and no one knows who I am, that’s fine by me. I know who my friends are and where they are. Facebook has seen to that. And I know that when I’m in Milwaukee this weekend I know several people there. And when I go to Seattle, I know people there. And when I go just about anywhere in the United States…I know people everywhere. When you travel and work in places all over, everywhere is your home. I’m limited here in my neighborhood, sure. But in the grand scheme of things, I’m not as unfriendly as I seem. As a matter of fact…I’m pretty damn popular by some standards.

So I don’t fret when I’m not noticed at the local grocery store. That’s fine, because in MY mind, I know where my friends are and that’s good enough for me. Well…except on a Friday night when I’m out with my wife & a few friends who know EVERYBODY. Then I wish that maybe I knew a few more of my neighbors. Maybe this summer I’ll try to work on that…

BRAINZ…!!!

I KNOW my zombie movies and this guy is NOT in “Night of the Living Dead”

In Entertainment Weekly this week there is a big article counting down from A to Z all you could ever want to know about zombie flicks. My wife was paging through it last night and we got into a discussion about zombie movies. Steph isn’t a big zombie film buff. As a matter of fact, she says she’s only seen 1 zombie ever in her lifetime and that one was the one where they are trapped in a mall.

Me: “Dawn Of The Dead.”

Her: “No. That’s not it. Maybe ‘Night of the Living Dead’?”

Me: “No. That was the original shot in black & white back in the 60′s.”

Her: “Yeah…the one I’ve seen was from the 80′s.”

Me: “If it was shot in a mall, then it was ‘Dawn of the Dead.’ They made another one a few years ago.”

Her: “I don’t think that is it. You got your IPhone? Check it out on the internet.”

Me: “Look…I know zombie movies and ‘Dawn of the Dead’ was set in a mall. It was shot in Pennsylvania somewhere back in the late 70′s. I don’t know where the latest one was shot but I do know that it was set in a mall and all the cast was running from zombies. Did the zombies run in the one you saw?”

Her: “No. Well…I don’t know. But I don’t think it was ‘Dawn of the Dead.’”

Me: *sigh* “Then I dunno…”

Her: “Wait! It was called ‘Night of the Comet!’ That’s it! There were 2 girls and they were shopping at the mall and zombie guys captured them.”

Me: “Uh…yeah…”Night of the Comet” is one of my favorite movies of all-time. Did you know that?”

Her: “Nope. I thought it was ‘Grosse Pointe Blank.”

Me: “Well yeah…that’s true. But ‘Night of the Comet’ is my all-time favorite B-movie from the 80′s. That scene, where they are running from the zombies at the mall? There is a song playing in the background that I’ve been trying to find for years. It’s called “Eyes On You”. Can’t find it anywhere.

Her: “You actually remember the song that is playing in that one scene?”

Me: “Yep. Wanna hear the song that is playing in the end credits? I have it on my IPhone…”

Her: “You are such a geek…”

The End