What The Heck…Donny Osmond?

I’m all for youth and looking younger and all…but is it just me or is Donny Osmond just a freak? Seriously…he SAYS he’s 51 (quoted from last night’s “Dancing With The Stars” episode) but I gotta believe the guy is going on 61. I mean…he’s been around FOREVER. I swear when I was 5 he [...]

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What The Heck…Rick Pitino?

We all know the hot water Rick Pitino has gotten himself in. He had sex at a bar (eeew?) with a woman who probably approached him while he was drinking and they found themselves doing the deed and now the deed has been done and then she got pregnant and asked him to help out [...]

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What The Heck…Pennies?

Find a penny, pick it up. And all day your day will suck.
I realize that for many, many years, there has been a money system in place here in our country. You have dollars and cents. The coins are basically quarters and dimes and nickels and silver dollars and half dollars and…pennies. I’m not sure, [...]

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What The Heck…McDonald’s Iced Mocha Coffee

And I quote…
Aromatic espresso beans are freshly ground, right before your eyes. Rich chocolate syrup splashes in. Next, luscious milk is artfully poured into your cup. Then comes the irresistible whipped cream, sculpted perfectly. And it’s all drizzled with thick, velvety chocolate. It’s a McCafe mocha masterpiece, made-to-order. And it’s hand-crafted, just for you. Try [...]

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What The Heck…Cheapie Theaters

I miss the good ol’ days…
I understand everyone is trying to make a buck these days. Times are tough and pennies are being pinched. I get it. I understand. But the other day I took my daughter & niece to see “Monsters vs Aliens” at the dollar theater and, much to my surprise, it ain’t [...]

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What The Heck…Giant Bug Glasses

They looked dumb then…
Okay…it’s been like…4 years now? Can’t we please get rid of these giant sunglasses that women seem to think are so cool but actually make you look like giant praying mantises? Or the Sleestacks from “Land of the Lost”…

I mean seriously…that look went out over 40 years ago! Jackie O might have [...]

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What The Heck…People Who Sit In The Intersection And Won’t Get The Hell Out Of My Way

Monday through Friday, I take my daughter to school. My daughter goes to a montessory school for 3 hours a day. She has learned to read words and count numbers and now she has learned some new swear words because every damn day, as I take her to her school, I have to sit in traffic [...]

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What The Heck…Lady GaGa???

Oh…shut…up!
I like me some decent pop music. I don’t mind when a pop star breaks through and makes a single that hits it on the chart and gets played a gazillion times and sells a bunch and kids like it and what not. But this month in Blender magazine, they interviewed pop artist Lady GaGa [...]

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What The Heck…Collector’s Edition Covers?

One of many…
For years now, magazines have been trying to come up with ways to get you to purchase their product. Lots of gimmicks abound ranging from lowering prices for a week to paying millions to have pictures of a celebrity baby. But I am confounded by this one particular gimmick that has been going [...]

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Ya Gotta Draw The Line…

I realize that everyone is freaking out and companies are laying people off at an alarming rate and prices keep going up and the world is looking like it is gonna come to an end. I realize all of this. And yet…there are a few things in life that I have determined will not be [...]

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What The Heck…Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Cover?

HUSBAND READER: Look…I realize that ‘Sports Illustrated’ has to sell magazines in order to meet it’s quota. And the Swimsuit edition is the “Super Bowl” in it’s arsenal. Scantily-clad models and sports figures, some wearing swimsuits, some wearing body paint, some not wearing ANYTHING (but positioned juuuuust right). So I guess I shouldn’t be surprised [...]

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What The Heck…Radio Shows On TV?

Seriously?
I realize that we are all out of unique and entertaining forms of television. Not a day goes by where I am flipping through stations (because that’s all I really do when I watch tv…change the channel…CONSTANTLY) and I come across another game show or reality show that’s not really reality or another stupid sitcom [...]

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What The Heck…IHOP?

So today, after I got home, my wife, daughter and myself go to the International House Of Pancakes for breakfast/lunch. We sit down. Nice enough waitress. Order our coffee & chocolate milk (Ava NEVER orders anything but!) and everything is fine….until my wife orders her breakfast.
She wants an egg benedict for breakfast. Well…apparently they don’t [...]

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What The F#@k…Horny People

Sorry Mr. VW Bug driver. I didn’t realize the light changed 1.1 seconds ago…
First off…this is gonna be a rant, because I am sick of it. So just so you know, it’s nothing personal, but here is what I’m thinking…
I am NOT a bad driver. I drive fast. I am not afraid to pass on the [...]

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What The Heck…”What The Heck?”

Kids say the darndest things. Especially when they repeat things after you have said them. My daughter has recently started repeating something that I say quite often…and my wife doesn’t like it one bit. 
Now I can be a somewhat vulgar person. I try not to be, but I’ve worked in the television industry for way [...]

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