Love Me A Chocolate Rabbit


Since I couldn’t be at home for Easter this year, I was unaware (or maybe I WAS aware, but had forgotten) that I had a chocolate rabbit in the fridge waiting for me. As I was shifting stuff around, trying to find whatever a grown man can eat with beer, I came across it. A mid-sized, solid chocolate Cadbury rabbit!

Now I don’t know about you, but for me, a SOLID chocolate rabbit is like…well…pretty damn AWESOME! Those other hollow bunnies don’t even compare. For me, there is nothing better than gnawing a SOLID rabbit down. And I do mean gnaw…slowly.

I eat the head first. Usually I just bite the whole thing off and then stuff it back in my cheek as I chew on it. Usually takes me 4 or 5 minutes. For those minutes, I can’t talk. All I can do is mumble and sigh and continue to chew. It is chocolatey heavan!

After I have swallowed the last bit of rabbit head goodness, I take the rest of the body and start teething my way from its neck stump…all the way down to it’s Thumper feet. This process all depends on the size of the rabbit of course. It could take a few minutes. It could take a few days. My wife recoiled in horror one day to find a half gnawed giant piece of chocolate bar in our fridge one time. “It’s gross,” she said. But she has never tried to gnaw through a giant, solid chocolate bunny, has she? Nooooo…so she is no longer allowed to comment.

In tonight’s case, this rabbit is really not all that big. It’s maybe 7 inches tall. I figure you give me another 10 minutes and maybe another beer and some more “Roadhouse” on TNT and I’ll have this thing long gone before tomorrow when the wife comes home…

And life is now all good…

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