Cootchy On My Face

I am a bit compulsive about my shaving cream. I always have a new container ready to go in case I run out, because I shave in the shower and I don’t want to have to jump my naked butt out of the shower, dig around in the closet and then get back in, getting everything soaked while scrummaging around. So it was a total shock this morning when I realized that my shaving cream was all gone. So now what was I gonna do?

Perusing the items we had in our shower, there was shampoo, conditioner, bath soap, shampoo for kids…and “Cootchy”.

Now, for some of you who might not know what “Cootchy” is, let me say this…this is a PG-13 site (mostly) and so I’m gonna keep this clean (get it? I’m in the shower? Keep it clean? Hang with me here…). But according to Pure Romance (which is where my wife got this particular product), “Cootchy” is a moisturizing conditioner that softens even the coursest hair for shaving. It provides rash-free shaving for all areas of the body. It ALSO doubles as a great hair conditioner! So BONUS! And…it’s great for both women…and men!

Moisturizer. Softens course hair. Rash-free. Great for shaving. Also for men. Excellent! I can use this stuff as my shaving cream! Right? Well…kind of…

First off, it’s called “Cootchy”. Secondly, it’s got this girlie smell to it. So once I started applying it to my 24 hour growth, I started to feel a little strange. And then when I started shaving, I might as well have applied soap to my mug because it would have done essentially the same thing. Whatever this stuff is used for…it ain’t for a guys face! That’s for sure! I scraped my way through and got the deed done, but I wouldn’t go putting “Cootchy” out there as the latest in men’s shaving needs.

So there ya have it. This morning I had cootchy on my face. 

And…that’s all I got.