Oh…I Got A Gift For You…And This AIN’T It!!!
The new catalogue from The Lakeside Collection came in today. Very exciting!!! And guess what!!! It’s the CHRISTMAS edition!!!!
WTF??? Are you kidding me?!?! It’s August…and 95 degrees outside!!! Are they nuts? Seriously…I’m pitching it before my wife sees it. But before I do…here’s a fast way to celibacy that I thought you should all know about…
ahem…(in my BEST sales t.v. sales pitch voice…)
Want to get your wife something that will ensure that you never see her naked EVER AGAIN?!?! Then buy her THIS from The Lakeside Collection catalogue! It’s the latest version of the chastity belt! Never worry about her walking around naked in the house again! And sex??? Fuggetaboutit! Life is warm and snuggly in the Snuggle Blanket. Available in 2 styles…”not sexy” and “never-gonna-get-it”! Order now! Or you might get left out for the holiday season! And for that SPECIAL someone…get their name embroidered on the corner…so that EVERYONE knows who ain’t getting some this season!
The Snuggle Blanket my butt. They should call it the ANTI-Snuggle blanket! LOL