So my lovely wife wanted to visit the super-mega-superduperstore known as IKEA. If you’ve never been there, well…you’re apparently NOT female because females LOVE this place! It’s chock full of everything that you could ever want for your kitchen or bathroom or living room or bedrooms. Stuff for you and your kids and your neighbors and your friends (just in case your neighbors AREN’T your friends…) and women LOVE to buy stuff for all those people. So it came as no shock to me when the call was finally made. Steph wanted to go to IKEA. And I was going. Pretty much if I wanted to or not. So we went and it was everything I had expected.
First off…I thought IKEA was a Japanese-run operation. Turns out it’s based in Sweden.
Secondly…they must have a lot of CRAP in Sweden because truthfully…that’s all this stuff is.
Don’t get me wrong, there are some things there that can be used around your house. And it’s mostly inexpensive stuff like spatulas and lightbulbs and cheap picture frames and stuff and that’s all good. I don’t know if it’s worth a 35 minute drive to go buy these items there when I could probably get it at my local Target or (god forbid) Walmart, but hey…chicks dig the IKEA. So we went and bought a few items. But in the process of finding these “small ticket items”, we were forced to wander aimlessly through a sea of crappy furniture and cardboard desks and paper-thin bed frames and just stuff that isn’t all that. It all has a shelf life of maybe 3 years, depending how much you use it and I find it somewhat amusing that so many people love this place as much as they do.
The interesting thing is that there’s just so MUCH of it! This “store” is the equivilent of an airplane hangar! It’s HUGE! It’s SO big they have to put arrows on the floor to guide you as you wander or else you might possibly get lost for days, never to be seen again until they restock their lighting fixtures section where they’ll find you propped up with a lampshade on your head. It’s so big they have maps and very nice people to point you in the direction you need to go (in my case…the exit). It’s SO big, they have “Prime Rib Night” where you can get a prime rib dinner for $8 while you shop. ANd they have an all-important play area for the kids so you can take your time (preferably 5 hours) and shop for all the things you don’t need but you’ll buy it anyway because it’s all so cheap at IKEA (and cheaply made).
Far be it for me to yuck someone else’s yum, but I don’t get the IKEA. I hear stories of people lined up outside and waiting to get in to shop. I find that unbelievable. It’s all just stuff. And not very well-made stuff. You could almost consider it a glorified Walmart with it’s inexpensive sales tags and it’s lowbrow demeanor. And for some people, that’s enough. But for me…gimme substance with a little more expense. I like my stuff to last! And I can’t imagine a child’s bed frame made of 6 pieces of wood and a light fixture attached is gonna last very long. As a matter of fact, I have to think that it’s gonna make for some pretty good firewood after about 4 or 5 months…