A Saturday Full Of Fun!

Today we helped our friends celebrate their 17th anniversary by watching their 4 children. I love their kids as my own, so this wasn’t a problem except for one thing…it’s 6 kids total running amok in my house. For a while it wasn’t so bad. The kids played outside while the baby took a 2 hour power nap. Then it started to rain so the kids came in and watched a movie. A couple of them even fell asleep during the movie and all was going well! But then, after they were all awake and bored and the Wii had worn out its welcome, all hell broke loose upstairs and it sounded like World War III had begun as the kids ran and stomped and threw toys and basically acted like the kids that they are. Nevertheless…no children were damaged in the aftermath and all adults left with their sanity intact. 

After some pizza and cookies, we headed out to the St. Rita’s Festival here in Cincinnati. Lots of fun stuff happening to keep the kids active with rides and games and live bands. Tonight, the band Rusty Griswolds were performing all my favorite 80’s tunes while Ava & I danced and Christopher had fun with his buddies sliding down the hill by the stage.

This was the first time Ava had seen a live band and she was mesmorized for about 3 songs, then all she wanted to do was ride the rides. We went and got ice cream and enjoyed a beautiful evening! And that’s what summer is all about…spending time with friends and family and enjoying a warm, summer evening together. Now if only I had taken my camera, the evening would have been complete. However I didn’t. So here are some pictures from the days events as the kids hung out here in our little cape cod…

Who’s that knocking on my door?

Ava  fed the baby!

One kid down…

At least someone finds me amusing!

How Well Does She Know Me?

So I stole this little “Wife Quiz” from GoodFather. I thought this would tide you over until I get my little kitchen video edited and posted on YouTube. I’ll have some pictures to post as well. Let’s see how well Stephanie knows me, shall we?

1. He’s sitting in front of the TV, what is on the screen?  Thriller/suspense movie

2. You’re out to eat; what kind of dressing does he get on his salad?  Thousand island … sometimes vinaigrette

3. What is his favorite toy?  ummm, what kind?

4. You go out to eat and have a drink, what does he order?   Beer – Michelob Ultra5. Where did he go to high school?  Philo

6. What size shoe does he wear?  11?

7. If he was to collect anything, what would it be?  CD’s … and bobbleheads

8. What is his favorite type of sandwich?   Ham at home, something with more meat — salami, pepperoni, etc. — at Subway

9. What would this person eat every day if he could?  French silk pie

10. What is his favorite cereal?  Anything with strawberries

11. What would he never wear?  A kilt

12. What is his favorite sports team?  Cincinnati teams, but you’re not a die-hard fan of anyone

13. Who did he vote for?  Obama

14. Who is his best friend?  JT & Newman

15. What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn’t do?   Pile up stuff around the house

16. What is his heritage?    Not sure.  I’m guessing Irish/German

17. You bake him a cake for his birthday:   Nope.  Red Velvet is your fav.

18. Did he play sports in high school?  Basketball

19. What could he spend hours doing?   Facebooking

20. What is one unique talent he has?  His creativity — in his words and his work

Looks like she has me down pat! I would say she got at least 17 of the 20! I bet I couldn’t get 10 of 20 for her. That’s how forgetful I am…

And Then It Happened…

Oh, the joys of fatherhood. Today was gonna be a lazy day. Mill around the house and do some work in my new kitchen. Things were quiet. TOO quiet, if you ask me. And then it happened…

“Daaaaaad! I’m booooooored.”

Can I tell ya…I HATE when that statement is made because that means one of two things.

1. I have to find something for them to do
2. I have to entertain them

In today’s case, I decided that having the neighbor boys come over to play might be the best option. The neighbor boys are actually the sons of our very good friends, so I figured having them over would be easy. Feed ‘em a popsicle and those kids are great! However, what I neglected to think about was that the neighbor boys are neighbors to the neighbor girls. The neighbor girls are also friends (Christopher is in the same grade as one of them), so of course THEY were playing in the neighbor boys’ yard when Christopher hopped the fence to see if the neighbor boys wanted to come over to play. So when the neighbor boys were asked to visit…so were the neighbor girls. So now we have not 2, not 4 6 kids playing in our yard, throwing toys about and basically behaving like the little heathens that kids can be.

Then my wife invited her friend over to see the new addition. I love my wife’s friend and haven’t seen her in quite some time, however she has 3 kids of her own. So when she arrived I knew my sanity would be in question. Adding to this was that she also brought one of her daughter’s friends along to visit. So if you do the math, we now have 10 kids in our backyard, scratching and clawing and swinging from vine to vine.

And then it happened…

One of them had to pee. And then another. And then one wanted a drink. And then it started to rain a little bit. And then they wanted to pet the dog. And then another one had to pee. And then another one snitched that one of the others had thrown a ball at his head. And then someone cried. And then another one would walk up to the door and peer in like she wanted something and then she would go away for 20 seconds only to reappear and do the same thing over & over again.

And then it happened…

“Can we have a popsicle?” “Can we have a snack?” “Can we have something to drink?” “Do you have juice boxes?” “Can we get some ice cream?” “I want a red popsicle. Do you have one?” “My mom said I can have a juice box.” “I’m really thirsty. Can I have some water?” “Do you have a band-aid?”

And then it happened…

I snapped. And then I turned into a 74-year old curmudgeon and I started barking and basically terrorizing 10 young children. I yelled and screamed and stomped my feet and pointed and swore and tore my hair out. And then it happened…

They started to laugh at me!

So I got them all popsicles.

The End

Picture Of The Day x 2_7.9.09

My Kids…and the summer rolls on!

Tan Man

Summertime Pigtails

Pixie Stick Power

On July 4th, my family & I attended a party where, as we were leaving, the host handed my kids 2 enormous Pixie Sticks. Don’t remember what Pixie Sticks are? Well…they normally come as small sticks of flavored sugar. But these were more like the Incredible Hulks of the candy world. I mean, these things were ginormous! They were about the size of my right arm (but not my left..it’s a little shorter. Dunno why) and, of course, the moment they got them my kids wanted to eat them. And, of course, we said no.

So 2 days passed, and the Pixie Sticks lived in my wife’s vehicle until Monday. And on Monday morning around 10am, I took the kids to the park. I’m not gonna say there is EVER a good time to allow your children to basically OD on sugar. It’s not good for them and it can be dangerous. However…if you’re gonna give ‘em giant Pixie Sticks and allow them to enjoy a little bit of a sugar high, 10am at the park seems like a good time to do it. Right? So I allowed them to rip them open and have at it.

The day was going fine until that point. Ava & Christopher ran around at the park. They played and enjoyed the sun. But as soon as it was time to get into the car, I realized my mistake. Honestly, Christopher seemed fine. He wasn’t doing anything out of the ordinary and, as I recall, he simply sat in the back playing his Nintendo DS and not really bothering me too much. Ava, on the other hand, could not…stop…talking.

She talked all the way home from the park. She talked for our entire lunch. She talked when we went home. She talked on the way to the pool. She talked to me and everyone we didn’t know at the pool! At one point, a mother who was in the pool with her son commented to me, “Got a chatty one there, doncha?” All I could do was grab Ava by her swimsuit and tug her to a different location. She talked, and chattered, and chittered for probably 5 hours. By the time I got her home from a full day of playing and swimming, she had seemingly came to the end of the sugar until we went back to the park for a tennis camp for Christopher and one of Ava’s friends arrived. And then it was back! I don’t know if Pixie Dust has magical powers where they are stored in reserve and when she needed that extra kick, the Dust came back and generated some kind of princess fairy energy? But she was back at it! And so was her friend! They talked and chatted and chitted and…

Wait a minute…her friend didn’t have any Pixie Dust??? Well then how can it be that Ava and Kate talked so much the entire time at the park AND at dinner???

What did you say? They’re little girls? What does THAT mean? You mean to tell me that little girls actually talk this much WITHOUT Pixie Dust???

Uh…oooookay…

I’m thinking this might be a very long week. Actually…make it a very long 15 years…

I Need A Loan For My Loan

It’s farther along now…but I want to post new pics once everything is in place…

So we’re having our kitchen redone and it’s coming along nicely! Got new cabinets in, new tile floor down. The room looks great and I’ll post some pics when it’s all finished. However the one thing I’m now learning as we go through this process is this…we didn’t borrow enough money.

I am all good with fueling the economy and doing my part to make sure that the cash flows. So when we took out the loan to have this work done, I felt pretty good about it. I mean…Steph is getting a new kitchen and I don’t have to buy an uber-expensive home in this neighborhood. Because where we live, the houses are either $160 grand or they jump to $500 grand…and there’s no in-between. Needless to say, we can’t afford a $500,000 home. So this was the happy medium, and I’m cool with that! Our house is looking great and so now I think we definitely did the right thing. But what the bank DIDN’T tell me, is that in order to take out a loan, I was gonna need another loan to get me by until our house was finished. Allow me to explain…

Since we have no kitchen, we have to eat out. In the beginning, this sounded great! Bob Evans every morning, Chipotle every night. Kids would love it. I would love it. No cooking or cleaning. It would be awesome! But ya know what? It’s freakin’ expensive! Everytime we go out to eat, it’s $30. Doesn’t matter if it’s breakfast, lunch or dinner. $30. And so you figure $30 per meal times 3 and that’s $90 a day for meals. Everyday…for the last 4 weeks. So you do the math and tell me…how in the hell am I supposed to do that? Because I still have all the other bills to pay! But right now, pretty much everything I earn is going towards eating out!

Oh sure…I also have to pay for a few other things…like keeping my family entertained while we’ve been kicked out of our home. So we’ve gone to the park and gone swimming and such. But then I’m stuck getting bored with the same routine so I take them to movies or amusement parks or what not. Eventually THAT costs me money. So throw the added cost in there. And then I realize that my wife wants all new stuff in the new kitchen! So now we have to buy a refrigerator and a new stove and possibly new dishes and stuff. Now, I realize that we COULD save money and not get these things. However, then we’re stuck with a kitchen with cherry wood cabinets, dark floors and countertops and a white fridge? Eeeech. I think not.

So having this all new space in our house is gonna be awesome! But as soon as it’s all in place, we’re eating in for the next 6 months. Unfortunately, we owe pretty much everyone we know a few dinners each. Sooooo…looks like I might have to take out another loan to help in all the paybacks that are gonna be needed!  :-)

Tunes From ITunes_7.1.09

Spoon…what?

Not a lot happening on the music front here recently. Don’t know if I would consider it to be the summer doldrums, but it kinda feels stagnate. Anyways…here are a few tracks that I’ve downloaded recently. Can’t say they are as interesting as previous downloads of U2, Green Day or Silversun Pickups, but not every song can be a classic!

Rob Thomas – “Gasoline”
Pure pop and easy to listen too. But, as I have stated before, this sounds fairly typical of him. Pretty much everything he puts out sounds the same. The guy needs to go back and learn how to rock a bit!

Moby – “Shot In The Back Of The Head”
An instrumental from the premiere electronica musician of these times. This could fall in the “great end of credits” music track! I really dig it…so check it out!

The Killer And The Star – “Starts When You Fall”
I LOVE this track. The album doesn’t drop til July 14th, but this might be my next CD purchase. If the rest of the album is as good as this ballad, I’ll be there!

Ace Hood – “Wife Material”
Featuring Lloyd, I like this rap track. An homage to that one special woman out of all the “other” girls. Nice and catchy!

Merz – “Lucky Adam”
Comes across as an unreleased Beatles track. Uptempo and short. Good pop tunage!

Spoon – “Got Nuffin”
I don’t know when these guys plan on releasing a new album, but I consider myself a big fan after last year’s “Ga Ga Ga Ga Ga” and 2005’s “Gimme Fiction”. I haven’t seen ‘em in concert yet…but I will! This track is great from the offset and never lets up. Great driving track!

Pete Yorn – “Last Summer”
I bought the whole album, but I gotta be honest…it’s kinda boring. I really have enjoyed Yorn’s previous albums, but this one is very lyric driven. I’m not in the mood for it right now. Hopefully I can revisit it later in the fall. For now…this track is about summer romance and as uptempo as anything else on the CD.

I got nothing for my “ALBUM OF THE WEEK” pick. Seriously, the new Wilco sounds somewhat uneventful. Rob Thomas’ disk sounds typical. I never buy country albums so I don’t know about Brad Paisley. I can’t stand Bjork. Soooo…I dunno. It’s just slow right now, I guess. Oh well…I gotta go outside and play with my kids anyway.

Transformers II Rocks The Summer Screen!

It’s hot outside. Megan Fox wants to cool you off!

I really enjoyed the first Transformers, so after seeing the trailer for this one, I was totally excited! But then the reviews started coming in…and then I was a little worried. But of course I had to go see it for myself on the big screen and I am happy to report…I was not disappointed.

First thing you should know is that it is a very long film. So taking an infant might be an issue. This apparently did not matter to a family who had a child who cried through the entire film in a packed theater on a Sunday night. Also, although this film might seem like a kiddie vehicle, seeing as how it is based on a toy line, it is NOT for kids under 13 (which might be why it’s rated PG-13). There is lots of cussing and violence and some disturbing images.

Okay…so that’s out of the way…let’s get to my review.

The action in this film is SPECTACULAR! The CGI is seemless and the robots and humans interact flawlessly. I was in constant amazement of how Michael Bay created some of the scenes that he did. Most of the battle scenes are some of the coolest since “Lord of the Rings” and the sheer amount of firepower that must have been used during filming is very impressive.

The cast does a great job acting with blue screen because every scene where there are robots and people, it actually seems like they are looking at the Autobots. From Shia LeBouf (who totally sucked in the last Indy Jones film) to John Turturro, everyone plays their part very well. This ain’t “Schindler’s List”, so there is obviously a scale in which to grade for a popcorn flick, and everyone carried their weight in this one. Especially Julie White, who plays Shia’s mom, Jusy Whitwicky. She gets some pretty funny scenes and steals some of the early comedic moments.

Megan Fox is hot.

I could tell you the plot but it is very convoluted and somewhat suspect, so I’ll boil it down to this…the Decepticons are looking to steal our sun and an evil lord known as The Fallen has returned to help in that process. It’s up to Sam Whitwicky (Shia) & the Autobots to stop them. Of course that is the REALLY abbreviated version of it. The film takes almost 20 minutes to tell the same thing that I just did in a sentence, but that’s okay…because I paid $10 to see this film and I could care less as long as there is a lot of explosions and cool robots and battle scenes. The plot is secondary. And in this film, Bay does action sequences like nobody’s business!

Megan Fox is hot.

So my final tally for this summer treat? If you liked the first one, you’re gonna LOVE this one! You can actually SEE the Transformers fight in this film (no more crazy editing like in the first one) and all the robots are awesome! Megan Fox is hot. The pace is set at 11 and everything moves pretty quickly despite the long run time. Oh…and Megan Fox is hot. And that’s all ya really need to know.

Legos vs Polly Pockets

 

Today my kids and I embarked on a dangerous adventure.

Did we brave the wilds of Africa? No.

Did we climb to the top of the highest mountain? No.

Did we attempt to raft down a thunderous river? Nope.

What exactly did we do then?

Well…we cleaned their rooms.

Oh I know. THAT’S not an adventure! Right? That’s what you are thinking, right? Well…it is if you’ve ever been IN one of my kids’ rooms. Actually, my kids aren’t really dirty children, they just have a lot of crap toys and stuff. So after a while, things tend to get a little cluttered. So today…we cleaned. And we did a great job! However, there is something I would like to point out to anyone who is gonna give gifts at a birthday party or as a Christmas gift or at a bar mitzvah…

Legos and Polly Pockets SUCK as gifts!

Allow me to explain. I give a toy usually a shelf life of about 2 weeks, depending on the toy, of course. If the toy is a Nintendo DS, it better last about 3 years. But for most over-the-counter, run-of-the-mill toys, on average…2 weeks. Because kids just don’t have an attention span for anything under $20. And usually (not always), most gifts that are given to them are under or around $20. Right? Right.

So what costs under $20 that you can get ANY child and it seems really cool when they open it, but then, after 4 days, has lost several pieces or is strewn from one room to the other, all tossed without a care into various corners of the house? Well…one could argue that just about ANY toy could be that. However I would argue that most toys are about 5 pieces or less. Remote control cars…2 pieces. Baby that drinks & pees…3 pieces. Videogame…1 piece. Barbie doll…5 pieces max.

But not a Legos playset or Polly Pocket dolls. Noooo…these suckers have multiple parts that all need to be organized in a Polly Pocket carrier or a Lego box. There are 2 arguments against these toys and here they are…

1. Legos: If you lose any pieces, the damn thing is a waste. Seriously…you give a 7-year old something that requires more than 10 minutes of his attention, then you can pretty much expect him to start throwing things in the air, launching lazer blasters at the dog and skewering toy action figures with flagpoles. Nothing that has over 50 pieces stands a chance of EVER getting put together!
2. Polly Pockets: Aren’t so much toys as they are walking hazards. If I told you how many PP pieces I have walked on while trying to get from one room in my house to the next, you would cringe. Those damn things HURT and if I have to stifle one more cry while tiptoeing through my sleeping daughters room to get something, I’m gonna take a torch to every little PP toy in the house!

So as much as you think you are buying a gift that anyone can use, let me give you a few words of advice…college scholarship fund. That’s right. Don’t even bother with a crappy gift! Just give cash to the college scholarship fund of said child and call it a day. At least then you know it will be going to good use. And if I were a betting man, I would think that a good education would trump crappy plastic toys any day. Maybe not at initial unwrapping, but definitely down the road when books are needed and cost $300 a shot!

What are YOUR thoughts on Legos vs Polly Pockets? Which would you buy for someone for a birthday gift? Which would you rather receive?

Guilty Pleasures…”Wait” by The Jacksons

With the passing of Michael Jackson, so many thoughts have crossed my mind on what to write about the dude. I mean, there’s really nothing that can be said that every media outlet in the world hasn’t already covered. He was brilliant. He was odd. He was a child in an adult body. Let’s face it…the guy was a little off his rocker. But you have to imagine that the childhood that was forced on him and then the media scrutiny and paparazzi probably took what little sanity he had and turned it inside out. I’m not condoning his life…I’m just trying to understand it. Nevertheless, an artistic force from my childhood is now gone and I’ve been trying to think what memory I have of The King Of Pop that I can share that no one else has covered…and I have found it.

It’s a track from the 1984 album by Michael and his brothers called “Victory”. You would probably remember it as the Jackson comeback album that was supposed to capitalize on Michael’s popularity after “Thriller”. Basically it was a way for Epic to make a few bucks because there really are only 2 tracks on the album that are fronted entirely by MJ (and one of those he shares with Mick Jagger). The rest are a variety of combinations of him and his brothers. Anyway, I’ve always liked this album. It’s not the best work of the Jackson 5 (well…”Jackson 6″ actually), but it came out at a time in my life that I have fond memories of. And to this day, there is a track buried on it that is one of my all-time favorite songs that no one has ever heard.

Track #2 on “Victory” is called “Wait”. It is actually a song that is fronted by Jackie Jackson and it has this great pop rhythm to it. It’s a long song (clocking in at 5:24) and it’s really not until 3:35 of the song that Michael makes an appearance. And for some reason, as soon as his signature vocals make their entrance, this whole track changes. And that is the magic of Michael. He has a distinct and irresistible voice that just takes an otherwise average song and transforms it into something that sticks in my head and holds my interest over 20 years later.

The man was an amazing icon and one that transformed music into what it is today. He basically took what Elvis started, with the dancing and hip thrusts, and took it to another level. Add in the magic that is “Thriller” plus several incredible tracks from the rest of his body of music and you have an artist that has not only inspired waves of musical talent after him, but also influenced how a generation listens to pop music.

Michael Jackson is gone and that is a very sad thing. How his legacy will be remembered, only time will tell. But when I’m in the mood, I’ll throw in this track and remember when I was young and how it made me want to dance. And when Michael’s voice soars, it makes me want to moonwalk. And that was the magic of Michael Jackson. He makes us (the 80’s generation) feel young again.

Rest in peace Michael. Your music and your talent will be missed!

What The Heck…McDonald’s Iced Mocha Coffee

And I quote…

Aromatic espresso beans are freshly ground, right before your eyes. Rich chocolate syrup splashes in. Next, luscious milk is artfully poured into your cup. Then comes the irresistible whipped cream, sculpted perfectly. And it’s all drizzled with thick, velvety chocolate. It’s a McCafe mocha masterpiece, made-to-order. And it’s hand-crafted, just for you. Try one steaming hot or over a landscape of ice.

Mmmmm…sounds mighty tasty, don’t it? And I guess it might be. But here’s the thing…this little bit of artfully sculpted writing isn’t for a 4-star restaurant or even Starbucks. This is from a placemat at McDonald’s. And it does sound tasty, right? Velvety chocolate, irresistable whipped cream, rich chocolate, luscious milk. All written very…adjectively. But here’s the thing…you are McDONALD’S. Not Caribou Coffee or Starbucks or any other chain of coffee purveyors. You are basically a chain based on your delicious and not-so-good-for-you french fries. Sure…coffee is great and if you wanna throw it into the mix, that’s fine. Like with your egg McMuffins (which are deliciously delicate with but a hint of rubbery ham) or with one of those egg burrito thingies. But as far as marketing coffee alone as one of your delicacies? Um…no.

Hey…you can do whatever ya want. But here’s my deal…if I want coffee at a premium price (the iced mocha at Mickey D’s is over $3), I sure as hell am not going to McDonald’s for it. I’m not saying it ain’t decent coffee. I don’t mind a cup of joe from the golden arches. And for a buck-fifty, it’s not a bad deal. But for $3.50? Nah. That’s Starbucks /Caribbou/enter YOUR favorite coffee shop territory there. And all the adjectives in the world aren’t gonna change what the product is…it’s basically Maxwell House with chocolate syrup and ice in it. And that’s fine if I’m at home in my jammies and reading the morning paper. But for $3.50 or such, I want something a little more fine-tasting.

So you’re not fooling me with your elaborate writing, Mr. McDonald’s. I’m onto your scheming ways. And thanks for thinking about me with the new coffee products that have taken up a fifth of your menu sign up at the drive-thru. But I’m still not buying it. Coffee is coffee, doesn’t matter how you spin it. And for over 3 bucks a pop…I’ll go shop at the local gas station and get it for $1 or less. Thanks!

2 American Icons Gone…

I am only 40, yet the hands of time keep pushing forward. Farrah Fawcett, although not my favorite Angel, will always be known as the girl in the red one piece swimsuit. That bright smile and that swimsuit (and what was in that swimsuit) was as much a part of the 70’s as John Travolta and disco. That poster hung on more than one of my friends’ brothers’ walls. Even as she was replaced time and time again by supermodel after supermodel, no one could ever forget that smile…and that swimsuit. Farrah Fawcett was a supermodel BEFORE there was such a thing. Now she is gone, succumbing to a long-standing bout with cancer, but her memory and her smile will never be forgotten. 

Michael Jackson will forever be known as The King Of Pop. With pop hits that spanned 3 decades and enough celebrity gossip to fill countless books, his memory will last forever in time. Like Diana or John Lennon, his death will never leave the American psyche. Whether you loved his music in the 80’s or whether you were turned off by the reports of his lifestyle later in the 90’s, Michael Jackson was a celebrity unlike any other. I personally will never forget the first time I saw “Thriller” on MTV for the first time. Or how I practiced the moonwalk for hours, trying to get it down “just like Michael”. Jackson is the only iconic 80’s recording artist that I have not seen perform live (Prince, Madonna & Bruce I’ve seen) and now that opportunity will never happen. Michael Jackson…an American icon for a generation gone at the early age of 50 from a heart attack.

Both will be missed for years to come.

Top 10 Changes That Come From Quitting…

Notice the fag in his left hand…

My brother Frank has recently kicked his nasty smoking addiction that we (our collective family) have been giving him crap about for pretty much the last 12 years of his existence. Finally, after mucho haggling and several tries, he has managed to put the cancer sticks down and has taken up a few newer habits. He asked me a while back why I hadn’t written about it, and I told him I thought it was really something HE should write about. So he did. I told him if he gave me a post, I would put it on my blog. And he did. So I am. Congratulations Frank! Quitting is the greatest thing you could have done for yourself and your family. I think I can speak for our entire family when I say…we are very proud of you and we love you! Now…here’s Frank’s blog which he also has posted on his anemic blog site called “The Veracity“….

Hell is officially frozen, pigs are flying and monkeys are crawling out of Alan’s butt!! That’s right ladies and gentlemen, brother Frank has quit smoking! How was that bet laid out again? Alan rides a fake bike and Frank quits the most addictive substance this side of Tang?! Fair? No. Besides, Alan lost like 15 lbs…and then gained 20 back hanging with school chum JT in one night! If the bet involved his nails, I’d have won easily! This calls for a list…

Top 10 Changes that come with quitting…

10. Shhhhh….It’s pretty quiet around here without all that bitching about my smoke.

9. 10 & 2 ……Both hands on the steering wheel, weird!

8. Work sucks. 20 minutes longer. No smoke breaks for NON-smokers is bullshit.

7.$180 richer…..$6 a pack x 30 days…you get the math.

6. Now what?…..I guess sleep follows directly after sex now.

5. Who farted?…..I can smell EVERYTHING!!!

4. I’m THAT guy…. I tell everyone I quit and how.

3. 30 sit ups, 50 push ups, 3-5 miles ever other day. No shit.

2. No more flem….I hope I spelled that right. (You didn’t. It’s “phlegm”  -Alan)

1. More people than ever hate me……Fuck them! Some say I am meaner, some are jealous or mad I actually quit smoking. Misery loves company and nothing pisses off a smoker more than someone who succeeded in quitting. My good smelling ass is gonna run right by them while cracking a six minute mile as they huddle around an ashtray grumbling how indecent it is for me to run in public wearing those shorts. I do it for the ladies.

Special thanks to Kathy for the “Book of Ages” which pretty much pushed me over the edge to quit.

Now he can take a deeper breath BEFORE he swings!

Konversations With Kids: I Have No Idea What She Is Talking About

Morning fresh!

8:45am. Christopher has a basketball camp in 15 minutes. We are scrambling to get him out the door. But the television is on and the boy has no focus when the boob tube is set on Cartoon Network. Throw in some Pop Tarts and grab him a water. Got his shoes on and are just waiting for the gooey Tarts to pop.

Steph: “Did you brush your teeth?”

Christopher: (furrowed brow) “But I haven’t eaten yet?”

He looks at me and I look at him and then I look at Stephanie.

Steph: “Well…you’re not going anywhere until you brush your teeth. You have to brush the morning off of them.”

Christopher looks at me with his mouth open. I look at him and then at my wife. She has her hands on her hips.

Me: “Ummm…better go brush off that morning stuff, dude.”

He turns and heads towards the bathroom. I turn and look at my wife…

“Brush the morning off them? What does THAT mean?” (begin giggling)

Steph: “Don’t start with me…”

Spinnerette Spinnin’ In My Head

Going through some new tunes on ITunes last night. Pete Yorn has a new album out that sounds fairly average. Placebo just ain’t my style, even though I enjoy some of their songs. Oh look…the Jonas Brother have a new disk. Huh…who knew? A few other artists and bands have some new stuff but nothing to get excited about. But wait! Who is this? A band I’ve never heard of …but actually I have!

Spinnerette feature a couple of members from the band The Distillers and a couple from the band, Eleven (and that’s not Finger Eleven!). With a cool & sexy voice, Brody Dalle leads the way in what could best be described as a power pop punk album. Lots of great tracks that I would compare to the great 90’s band, Garbage.  If you liked The Distillers, this really doesn’t carry the same weight as their stuff. This is a little more fluffy and soft around the edges. Which isn’t a bad thing, I don’t think. With the Distillers, I thought Dalle came across as sounding a little too much like Courtney Love or a low-rent Joan Jett. Now she is carrying a tune. Check out his clip from the new self-titled debut album and let me know what you think! It’s my new favorite “stuck in my head and can’t get it out” track!